I'm not hooking this up to FB. Even if a friend stumbles across this, it might not make sense, because I'm not going to tell the whole story. Still, I just had to write it down.
One of my major character flaws is my difficulty in handling disappointment. I tend to get way too upset if I don't get what I want, or what I was expecting, or if plans are canceled or simply don't go my way.
I know it's wrong. I am trying to work on that. Most of the time if I am disappointed and angry or sad about it, I try not to talk about it too much - even to my husband. I know most of the time I'm probably being unreasonable. While "talking it out" can sometimes help one deal with negative feelings, there are times when not talking about it can help me not dwell on the issue at hand.
Well, in this one particular case, I feel I have every right to be disappointed. When it first happened, I really really did try to be mature about it. I tried not to talk about it. I did my best to tell myself I should just accept it.
But you know what? This time things should have gone my way. It was the right thing to do to put the game in my favor. I deserved what should have come to me. At the very least, I think I deserved it more than...
Well, never mind. I'm going to stop here. I said what I needed to say. What's been done can't be undone. Chances are I'll never be given the chance for this to go in my favor. I need to move on.